Facebook IPO sucker scheme task list almost complete

As expected, social networking giant raises share offer price range to excite the rubes

Anonymously leak unverifiable estimates of huge revenue growth to lazy, pliant, non-skeptical tech and business media. Check

Anonymously leak invented and over-inflated valuation of company to lazy, pliant, non-skeptical tech and business media. Check

Anonymously leak exciting news that incessantly hyped IPO may be moved up to lazy, pliant, non-skeptical tech and business media. Check

Finally file for the IPO, but be vague about share information, and lowball the amount company seeks to raise. This allows for plenty of room to jack up the numbers and whip gullible retail investors -- along with the lazy, pliant, non-skeptical tech and business media -- into a frenzy. Check

Set share price range that slightly lowballs valuation relative to previous invested estimates. (Don't worry; this is just a set-up.) Check

Launch glitzy, high-profile road show. The lazy, pliant, non-skeptical tech and business media will do all the promotional work for you. Check

Days later, anonymously leak exciting news that IPO already is oversubscribed because demand is so crazy high(!) to lazy, pliant, non-skeptical tech and business media. Check

Raise the share offer price range in response to the tremendous demand from institutional investors. Close books prematurely on IPO shares offered to large investors in order to create sense of panic among gullible retail investors. Check

Sit back and watch as rubes and suckers pay double and triple the already inflated offer price on the first day of trading. Coming Friday

Did I miss anything, Wall Street?

Insider: How the basic tech behind the Internet works
Don't miss
Join the discussion
Be the first to comment on this article. Our Commenting Policies