Who would win a cyberwar between Anonymous and God?

Hacking collective in weird public throwdown -- or not -- with Westboro Baptist Church

First, a disclaimer: I am totally unfamiliar with God's hacking skills, or "skilz," as they say on the street. Perhaps they are "sick." Perhaps they are "mad." No doubt they are "righteous." For awhile it looked like they might be put to the test, as everyone's favorite holy collective of demented hate, the Westboro Baptist Church, responded to a warning from the hacking collective Anonymous that the church cease its abhorrent demonstrations outside funerals to promote its virulently anti-gay jihad. (Also see: Obama, technology leaders to discuss secret plan for mobile-apps-based Muslim caliphate) The Westboro Baptist Church on Saturday responded on its website with an "Open Letter from Westboro Baptist Servants of God to Anonymous Coward Crybaby “Hackers” BRING IT!" Not exactly an olive branch. The open letter ends with "GOD HATES FAGS & LOUSY 'HACKERS!'" (Great. Now someone has to spend all weekend making new protest signs for military funerals. But it is the Lord's work.) and warns that by attacking the Westboro Baptist Church's tax-deductible worship site, gothatesfags.com, Anonymous would be "warring with God." This was going to be epic, like God vs. Satan or Tyson vs. Holyfield. But Anonymous on Monday said the initial warning to the church attributed to the hacker group was a hoax. From International Business Times: Anonymous has since posted a message this morning saying the original message was a trap set up by "attention whoring idiots." They said they have more pressing matters, but would get back to the Westboro Church at a later time. I can't wait. In the meantime, there's a nifty little counter on Westboro Baptist Church's main page (godhatesfags.com) that tells you the number of "people whom God has cast into hell since you loaded this page." I was on the site for a half-hour and personally saw more than 3,000 souls cast to eternal damnation. I mean, He was just tossing them left and right. It sort of put a DDoS attack in perspective.

Chris Nerney writes about the business side of technology market strategies and trends, legal issues, leadership changes, mergers, venture capital, IPOs and technology stocks. Follow him on Twitter @ChrisNerney.

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