Obama, technology leaders to discuss secret plan for mobile-apps-based Muslim caliphate

And whatever other bizarre conspiracy theories are running rampant in Glenn Beck's brain

Someone is on to the liberal conspiracy between the Obama Administration and search giant Google, and that someone is Fox Network star and American hero Glenn Beck. So when the president meets Thursday night with Google CEO Eric Schmidt and other tech giants -- including Apple chief executive Steve Jobs and Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg -- Beck will be hard at work looking for data vectors, conducting regression analysis and making sh*t up. In the video below, Beck says: "May I recommend if you're doing your own homework, don't do a Google search. It seems to me that Google is pretty deeply in bed with the government. Remember, maybe this is explaining why Google is being kicked out of all the other countries. Are they just a shill now for the United States government?" Which really isn't a point as much as a vaguely accusatory string of unverified suppositions and assumptions. But Beck has a lot of air time to fill, so brevity is not his friend. However, if viewers are patient enough, they are afforded a fleeting glimpse of paranoia the truth: "Are you comfortable with a government partnering covertly with media organizations, search engines, social networking so they can bring change that the Washington elites have designed?" And it is that secret conspiracy which will occupy dessert talk between Obama and his hand-picked triumvirate of corporate tools -- search engines (Google), social networking (Facebook) and media (Apple). Triumvirate, that is, as in tri. As in three. As in Trilateral Commission. It's all right there for anyone who cares to use a little common sense and Microsoft's Bing search engine. Has anyone ever noticed that when you do a Google search on "George Soros", you get 2.7 million hits, but when you do the same search on Bing, you only get 1.57 million? Boy, they must really love George Soros at Google. You have to ask why. Why does Google love George Soros? What do they have in common? What perverse values? What flawed algorithms? Finally, think about this, my friends: George Soros's initials are G.S. If Google were to adopt a second name so it also could have two initials, don't you think the company would want the same initials as its hero, George Soros -- or G.S.? See how the pieces fit together? Google S., Google S., Google S., what could the "S" be? What would make sense? Oh wait, I've got it! It's so obvious: G.S. stands for Google Sociallsts. And we all know what that means. I'm going into my crying bunker now.

Chris Nerney writes about the business side of technology market strategies and trends, legal issues, leadership changes, mergers, venture capital, IPOs and technology stocks. Follow him on Twitter @ChrisNerney.

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